I'm not going to race this weekend. Cycling is a hobby - an integral, enjoyable, beautiful part of 'me' but still a hobby. Nothing more. I don't owe it anything and it doesn't owe me anything. We have a mutually agreeable relationship.
At at the moment we aren't speaking.
So I'm going to spend the weekend with my other friends. Running and climbing. Cycling will get over it.
Does anyone want my Kielder number?